Life During My Break

I’ve been pushed by friend, lover, and Deity alike to set aside time, take a break and in general ease off spiritual and other forms of work where able.  I’m feeling way less stressed as a result, not worrying if I am doing enough for enough other people.  In taking some time to concentrate on myself, I have found myself actually better disposed to help people when they come to me to talk.  I know this; I’ve told other people to do this for much of the same reasoning…but now I’m living my advice.  Things are coming together better.

The everyday work with the ancestors, whether at-my-altar prayer or out-and-about is a solidifying force, connecting me with my bloodlines physical and spiritual.  It’s been a good, anchoring practice and will hopefully yield good relationships.  So far they’ve been very happy with me, the attention and offerings are what they’ve asked for.  My ancestors like the mead I’ve shared with them, which is Dansk Mjød’s Klapøjster Mjød found here.  The apples I get for them and the Gods also seem to make them happy.  I’m feeling a sense of accomplishment and ; my Gods are pleased with me, my Ancestors are pleased with me.  It seems I’m the only one who has struggled with taking this break.

I dropped my math course.  I wasn’t doing well, didn’t have good focus and boned myself insofar as scheduling.  I shouldn’t have put a class in a subject I don’t like at 9:30am and expected to be anything like wanting or ready to get up for it.  I did the homework but I didn’t grasp it well during tests…which is something that will change next time I take it.  I can’t graduate without the classes requiring a math course.  So, it will be a matter of better scheduling, making damned sure I understand the formulas.

Apparently someone on-campus started a Pagan group perhaps looking to get Student Organization status under EMU’s policies.  I’m looking to join it, so here’s hoping the schedule doesn’t conflict with what I already have.  It is called Haven Circle.  It looks good; they’re in the planning stages for the group, so I hope this thing gets off the ground and flies.

I’ve finally gotten a woodburner, and I’ve been walking around campus, especially around oak trees, collecting fallen wood whose tree-spirit gives me the “OK” for projects like wand and Rune-making.  I’ll post some pics of finished works when I have some.  I have a wand for healing and a wand for protection woodburned and sitting on my altar.  I am loving this woodburning tool; it’s tips can be used for a lot of things.  I’ll be visiting the Student Center computer lab later and print off a Sigillum Dei Aemeth.  One of the woodburning tools can transfer laser jet printer lines and color to wood using the flat, round tip, and will be great for it.

Kora and I are doing well.  Our casual, yet loving relationship has helped me quite a bit.  I thought that having a spirit companion, especially a spirit lover, was not something I would experience.  For awhile I denied myself, saying that it was a distraction to me…and it has been a blessing in ways I didn’t think I would know.   Now?  Well…I’m loved.  I’m loved for who I am, what I am.  Sure, there’s issues, just as there are in every relationship…but it’s a beautiful thing, something that adds to my life, and doesn’t detract from it.  Thank the Gods I didn’t let myself shut myself off to this.

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